Kanjoos Jokes

Kanjoos Makkhi Choos 

Kanjoos: Yeh kaila(banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Kanjoos: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Kanjoos:Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de 

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A Kanjoos on his death time.
My wife, where r u ?
Wife:Yes, Im here
My sons & daughters ru all here?
Yes, Papa
Kanjoos:To phir baju wale kamre ka pankha Q khula hay

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1 Kanjoos 14th floor se neche gira
Girte waqt usne apni ghar ki khirki me apni wife ko roti pakate hue dekha
to chilla k bola
MERI ROTI NAHI PAKANA! 
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Kanjoos ne arbi ko khoon dey k uski jaan bachai.
Arbi ne usay MERCEDES gift kardi.
Arbi ko phir khoon ki zarorut pari, Kanjoos ne phir khoon dia.
Ab k bar Arbi ne till waly laddu gift kiye, Kanjoos:Ghusse se, mercedez kion nahi di?
Arbi:Munna!! Ab hamarey ander bhi Kanjoos ka khoon dor raha hay

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A Kanjoos called a newspaper office and asked: Mera Baap Mar gaya hai, kya charges hongay? NewsPaper: Rs.50 per word.
Kanjoos: Oh bohat ziyada hain, Acha likho "Sohan Bhai Died".
Newspaper: Sir! It should be minimum 6 words!
Kanjoos: Oh ho! Jara sochnay do..... Acha likho....... ......... .
"Sohan Bhai Died - Suzuki for Sale "
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Kanjoos ask to Taxi Driver: Abdullah Shah Ghazi k mazaar jao gay?
Taxi Driver: Han jaon ga.
Kanjoos ne jaib se shopper nikala or kaha:
Wapsi main langar ki biryani lete aana.
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Shadi me 1 Kanjoos bahut der tk khata raha,
Kise ne poocha bhai, kab tak khaty rhogy?
Kanjoos: Yaar me khud kha kha k thak gaya hun phir kya karoon, card me likha tha

"Dinner 7 to 10pm"
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Kanjoos to dukandar: Yaar zara toothbrush dena mere brush ka 1 baal toot gaya hai
Dukandar: 1 baal toota to naya q le rahe ho
Kanjoos: jo toota hai woh akhri tha.
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Titanic K Sath Kanjoos Bhi Doob Raha Tha Aur Hans Bhi Raha Tha
Dost: Oye Hans Kyun Raha Hai?
Kanjoos: Shukar Hai Main Ne Return Ticket Nahi Khareeda

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