New Jokes

1) What is the similarity between Bill gates and me? Dont know? So simple, He never comes to my house and I never go to his house ...EGO PRoblem

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2) We sms Each Other B'coz U Think Im Nice i Think Ur Nice U Think Im Cool i Think Ur Cool U Think Im Sweet i Think Ur Sweet U Think Im Smart i Think Ur RigHT

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3) Who Said English is Easy

Fill this blank with
Yes or No?

1. __ I don't have a BRAIN.

2. __I dont have SENSE.

3. __I am STUPID.

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4) I can't live without u. Without u I can't even imagine 2 exist. U r in my breath, I can't live without u even for a second.

HOLD ON...HOLD ON...
Itna khush hone ki jarurat nahin hai, I am talking about OXYGEN.

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5) I was writing 3 Good Lines about u i wrote:

1.. )_______

2. )_______

3. )_______

nalayak kuchh to accha kiya hota life mein, tabhi likhta.

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6) I want to Share 'EVRYTHING' with U. Your JOYS ur SADNESS, ur HAPPY MOMENTS. Every Single SECOND OF THE DAY. Let's START with Your "BANK A/C

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7) When cloud breaks rain falls, When coconut breaks water falls, When luv breaks tears fall, But.. When ur HEAD breaks.. Aailaa !!! Khali hai!

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8) U r sweet U r caring U r artist U r kind U r intelligent U r atractive U r smart thoda aur IMPROVE karo Tabhi mere jaise banoge.

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9) Aaj ye baat samjh aai,is dharti par Apki hukumat samjh aai,apko dharti par bhejna khuda ka bahana tha,kyunki ravan k bad kisi ko to aana tha..

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10) A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife..

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11) PanditJi ne apke mobile ki rashi dekh kar bataya hai ki aapke mobile pe KANJOOSI ki mahadsha mandra rahi hai. Turant 21 Sms ka yagna karvao

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12) Shukriya karo oos khuda ka k usne hume banaya hai... kyonki ek pyaara, achchha, smart,cute Handsom sa dost humne na sahi tumne to paya hai

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13) Ishq ne insaan ko kya se kya bana diya, kisiko ashiq to kisiko deewana bana diya, 2 phool ka boj na utha sakti thi mumtaj,  shahjahan ne pura taj mahal mumtaj par bana diya.

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14) There once lived 4 friends, Mad, Brain, Sumbody, Nobody. 1 day, Sumbody killed Nobody. That time Brain was in toilet Mad called the police.
Mad: Is it police station?
Police: Yes,what is the matter?
Mad: Sumbody killed Nobody
Police: R u mad?
Mad: Yes, Iam Mad
Police: Dont u have brain?
Mad: Brain is in the toilet.

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15) Main aapko dekhna chahta hoon, aapse milna chahta hoon, par yeh log bahut zalim hain kehte hain


"ZOO"bandh ho gaya kal aana...

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16) Sweet persons talk from HUTCH. Lovers talk from AIRTEL. Beggers talk from BSNL. Beuties talk from SPICE. But BRILLIANTS never talk. They send SMS

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17) Asmaan per jitne sitare hain! Ankhon main jitne ishare hain 'Samander ke jitne kinare hain " UTNE SCREW DHEELE TUMHARE HAIN " ha ha ha

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18) Wife:kal raat tum neend me mujhe gaaliya de rahe the.
Husband:Tumhe galat fehmi hui hai.
Wife:kaisi galat fehmi?
Husband:Yehi ki main soya hua tha.

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19) Sardar Director: U Should jump 2 d swiming-pool frm 100 ft Height.
Actor: i don't know swimming.
SardarDirector: don't wory, their is no water.

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20) Hi jaan_
Kya haal hai jaan_
Kaha ho jaan_
Kab miloge jaan_
Tumhari badi yaad aa rahi hai jaan_
Zyada khush na ho.
Har blank _ mein " var" word add kar lena.